9 ways travelers are handling Ebola anxiety

Fear of Ebola on airplanes is spreading faster than actual Ebola on airplanes.

STORY HIGHLIGHTS

• Our well-prepared traveler carries a face mask and wipes
• The conspiracy theorist thinks it's all Obama's fault (or the Republicans')
• Our medical adviser has read all the science websites
• Our lover of atlases understands that Africa is big

With Ebola panic traveling faster than a 787, travelers trapped in metal containers at 30,000 feet are quickly splitting into camps.

Are you canceling your flight or packing your antibacterial hand wipes and bravely going forward? Maybe you're tweeting out your stress while you wonder what to do next.

We've found nine types of travelers, almost all determined to get to their destinations with some of their sanity intact. Which one are you?

1. The provocateur

"Ebola" has become the new "bomb" in the world of flying: It's a word you don't want to use in jest unless you want to get tossed off a plane, tested for a disease you probably don't have and possibly arrested. ‏

2. The well-prepared traveler

The well-prepared traveler has a face mask, wipes and another set of clothes to change into upon arrival at her final destination. The rest of us can admire her outfit.

3. The conspiracy theorist

The paranoid traveler thinks Ebola is the newest form of terrorism against the Western world. Maybe he's right. But you'd think the terrorists would choose a virus that transmitted more easily, perhaps through the air instead of body fluids.

4. The medical adviser

This traveler has read the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention website, WebMD and the advice of CNN's own Dr. Sanjay Gupta and now knows all the problems with the current government protocols designed to keep Ebola from spreading. (And he could be right, which adds to our paranoia.)

5. The political partisan

Whatever happens with Ebola, it's President Barack Obama's fault, these people say, for not closing the borders. Or the Republicans' fault for not adequately funding the National Institutes of Health to further its quest for a viable Ebola vaccine.

6. The fatalist

While many heroic health care and travel professionals are fighting Ebola on the front lines, some travelers see evidence of lax efforts in the fight against the disease. Do you want to sit next to someone who just vomited on your flight, no matter why he or she is throwing up? Nope.

7. The comic

This person is just hilarious ... on land. Those tweets aren't so funny in the air.

8. The rational traveler

The reasonable, rational flier seeks out scientific information to address any concerns, like this useful video from a doctor, and adjusts her plans accordingly (or not). Seeking out this information calms her down.

9. The geography professor

Some travelers use their knowledge of Africa's geography to share that a) three West African countries are severely affected by Ebola; b) Africa is a very large continent, which means that c) travelers coming from South Africa aren't anywhere near West Africa. The distance between Monrovia, Liberia, and Cape Town, South Africa, is farther than the distance between Los Angeles and New York.